| The Essential Collection from Kathy Sanborn |
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Life is full of ups and downs, and, depending on which person you talk to on any given day, there are mostly ups or mostly downs. It's the old "glass half empty or half full" philosophy - it all depends on how you look at things as to whether you end up a winner or a loser in the game of life. Take discouragement, for example. It's easy to let yourself become discouraged because your goal may be taking too long, or because too many boulders are standing in the way of your success. It's harder to be a steamroller towards your dreams, but it's absolutely necessary if you want to achieve your goals! Always let yourself have the last word about your dreams. Listening to the advice of others is fine, but allow yourself to make your own decisions about where your life is headed. If you really want to move to the mountains but your family doesn't approve, do what makes you happy - and move! Don't believe it when they say it can't be done. Although your friends and family have your best interests at heart, they might be saying things like, "You won't be able to make a living doing that job," or "Your skills aren't good enough to make it," and so on. Don't let their negative talk keep you from developing and using your unique abilities. Hold on when the going is toughest. Because your dreams could take longer than you'd planned, don't quit until you're sure it's the right thing to do. History is full of stories about people who were ready to throw their dreams away only to receive good news about an opportunity that changed their lives! Believe in your talents. You have what it takes to make your dreams come true. You wouldn't have a dream in the first place if you weren't supposed to pursue it! That doesn't mean success will fall in your lap without any effort on your part. You've got to believe in your own abilities or you won't stay in the race for the long haul. Associate with other positive individuals. As much as you can do so, associate with people who support your dreams. If you have to avoid negative individuals in order to make your days happier, then so be it. You deserve a peaceful environment, with friends and family who encourage your success and brighten your days. © 2007 Kathy Sanborn
The Courage to Leap One of the major reasons that might prevent a person from going after any fresh goals is the fear factor: a very real terror of change and its aftermath. It takes great courage to follow a dream, especially when you see no visible evidence that your dream will work out. If you have visions of career change or some other life transformation in 2006, a big part of your success will be releasing any fears around making that change. One important thing you can do to avoid feeling frightened when you begin a big change is to plan for it way ahead of time. Make a list of your fears and jot down practical steps you can take to alleviate a sense of panic. Finding out all you can about potential challenges ahead can do wonders for your confidence. It's usually the unknown that brings on fear, so strive to attain the knowledge you'll need for a successful transition. For instance, if your plan is to relocate for your career this year, do research on prospective places to live, familiarizing yourself with cities of interest and the amenities they have to offer. Contact chambers of commerce for packets of information on housing, employment, and local statistics. If you're sufficiently informed, you'll be able to make a much better decision on a major life change. The more you know, the less you will fear the outcome of your actions for growth. Feelings of gloom and doom can keep an individual from making a much-needed move or adjustment. Because courage is necessary to achieve almost anything worthwhile, developing a trust in your own feelings of intuition is crucial. If your gut is telling you to make a move, ignoring that feeling could keep you from fulfilling your own bright destiny. In the end, the choice is up to you. Remember that fear usually can be swept away by moving through the sensation and releasing the feeling - setting it free, much as a bird released from a cage. Having enough courage to step off the imaginary cliff into the unknown future can lead to much career progress and personal growth in 2006. When you take that leap, believe that you'll land softly on the bed of success! © 2007 Kathy Sanborn
The Five Ways to Unlimited Thinking Too often, we tend to think that other people have more skills and better luck than we do in life. We see others making their way to the podium of success -- with a big salary, satisfying work, and enjoyable relationships. The truth is they are no different from you, except perhaps in one important area: they practice unlimited thinking! Unlimited thinking is about embracing your ability to achieve your desires. Limited thinking is the opposite: accepting destructive ideas that keep you from moving towards your goals with confidence. Let's take a look at the five ways to get rid of limited thinking. 1) Ignore the naysayers, and listen to your own wisdom. Avoid the people in your life who are quick to tell you "it can't be done." If the Wright brothers had listened to the negative comments of opinionated individuals, they might have stopped before they reached their dream of flight. 2) Keep tabs on your own thoughts, and change them if they aren't positive. If you catch yourself thinking that you'll never reach your goal, stop -- and modify that idea with something positive. Edison didn't let any pessimistic thinking stop him from working tirelessly to invent the electric light. 3) Allow your goals to be lofty ones. Let yourself strive for the ultimate of dreams, because to do anything else is to believe in your lack of ability to achieve it. Don't discount your daydreams as silly or superficial. If being a doctor is your goal, trust in your own capability to accomplish it. 4) Give yourself enough time to make it real. Your dreams may take longer than you want them to, but quitting too soon will not be the answer if the going gets rough. Anything worthwhile will take as long as it takes -- so hang in and stay the course if you truly desire to accomplish something. 5) If you reach a blockade, figure out how to overcome it. On your course to success, you'll be sure to see a few roadblocks in your way. How you handle those roadblocks will be a clue to your ultimate triumph. They called it "Disney's Folly," when Walt Disney was working on his dream of completing Disneyland. Despite the stumbling blocks that cropped up along the way, Disney steadfastly pursued his goal and created his timeless and unparalleled treasure. With unlimited thinking, you can, too! © 2007 Kathy Sanborn
Aging Gracefully There's a trend in home decorating that includes antiques, faux finishing (making walls look old with special paint techniques) and "distressed" furniture. Anything old or even appearing to be antique is good when it comes to the interior design of your home. When it comes to your face and body, however, the rule of thumb changes -- because any sign of aging has become reason enough to run to the plastic surgeon or latest diet and exercise guru. What gives with the concept of "old" being embraced in home decorating, but shunned when it comes to people's bodies? Apparently, old buildings and antique décor are respected for their historical worth. Does an older person have to overhaul herself in order to be valued as well? We as a society buy into the idea that youth is better, perhaps without realizing why we do. In truth, to be young is not always an advantage -- mature individuals usually have the edge on wisdom, based on life experience ("the school of hard knocks"). And you can't ignore an older worker's job expertise as compared to that of a green youth fresh out of school. Be that as it may, we tend to judge a book by its cover, and if the package isn't pretty and fresh, it may go unnoticed and unappreciated. Unfortunately, we tend to determine a person's value by physical beauty (or lack thereof) as well. Of course, the older the individual, the more wrinkles -- and therefore, "flaws" -- he may have. Too bad mature folks can't be judged like pieces of furniture -- where the "antique look" is worth more! But, alas, until that magical day when your "inner you" counts more than the outer one, you might be one of the crowd continuously working on your appearance. Maybe you're watching every new line on your face, counting grams of fat in your diet, and looking nervously across the room at a party for someone who might be younger and more attractive. Or -- you could decide that you won't accept the culture's take on the supremacy of youth, letting each wrinkle and imperfection show up at its own time. Rest assured, there's no necessity for going under the knife to try to stay youthful. Actor Jamie Lee Curtis says in a People magazine interview, "I did all of it [plastic surgery] in attempting to stave off aging." She added that the surgery made her look and feel worse. In the end, it's how you feel about yourself that counts. You can't buy self-acceptance in a drugstore or a doctor's office. Like most things of value, self-respect comes from within. © 2007 Kathy Sanborn
Open a New Door I often talk about the importance of keeping your eyes open for signs to help you make your next move to personal fulfillment and professional success. If a particular door to a cherished goal keeps closing on you, it's because there is another door getting ready to open. As Helen Keller so wisely said, when one door closes, another opens. The trick is to watch your environment and listen to your intuition for helpful hints as you go through each day. For instance, if you've recently lost your job, you probably are dealing with fear, uncertainty, and sadness as you try to figure out your next step. Instead of reacting out of panic because the door to your job has closed, take some time to listen to your own inner wisdom for advice about your next opportunity, and then tune into your surroundings as you go about the business of living. Signs from your environment can be wide-ranging, but valuable just the same. Maybe a friend will have a lead for you after you tell her you're seeking work. Perhaps you'll run into an old acquaintance who knows of a company that's hiring right now. Or maybe you'll get an impulse to submit your résumé to a business you've always wanted to work for. Whatever the case, by paying attention to your own intuition and the feedback you receive from your network of friends, relatives, and acquaintances, you will be that much closer to finding your next spot. No matter what your current circumstances, if you've experienced the closing of one door, rest assured that new opportunity is on its way to you. Sometimes we bemoan the fact that the door is closed, instead of looking forward to the new door that swings wide open to let us in. The new door will usher in an even better opportunity than what was lost to you in the first place, so welcome it! You'll be glad that you did. © 2007 Kathy Sanborn
Managing the Fear Factor Since the publication of my new book, The Seasons of Your Career, I've been speaking to many individuals as I travel on my book tour. One thing I've noticed that is fairly common among my audiences is a hesitation to go after a career or personal dream, due to fear or a lack of confidence. Taming feelings of fear can be challenging, especially because they can seem overwhelming at times. Maybe you feel fearful more often than you'd prefer, and aren't sure how to make those thoughts of gloom and doom go away. Remember that everyone has to face fear in his or her life. Some people are fearful often, while others have learned to keep those thoughts of apprehension at bay through mental discipline. If you are one of the many individuals dealing with thoughts that are keeping you from going after your own cherished dreams, you may want to follow these tips. Focus on the Bright Side Just as there are two sides to every coin, so are there two ways of looking at the world. When you catch yourself with a thought that something awful may happen if you go after your dream, gently ease it out of your mind by replacing it with a positive statement instead. Rather than saying, "If I change jobs, I might fail," say to yourself, "I'm open to new opportunities in my career. I'm successful in whatever I do." It isn't mumbo-jumbo to change your negative beliefs. Focusing on the positive and optimistic side of life actually will result in an increased ability to create, and take advantage of, new opportunities. Follow Your Heart's Message Your deepest feelings are clues to the next road you may need to take on your way to personal and professional success. By listening to your heart (instead of just taking the advice of friends and relatives), you can begin the process of making your goals happen. Other people often are more than happy to tell you what you should be doing, but they may not have the best suggestions for your situation. Pay attention to your own feelings and you'll have the finest guidance you could ask for. Do Your Homework Having said the above, it's up to you to do the research on how to make your objectives a reality. Blindly going after a goal is not the best approach for success. The fear factor tends to evaporate when an individual has complete information at his fingertips, so along with trusting your own gut feelings, use your common sense and find out the methods you can use to achieve your goals. A combination of a practical and intuitive approach to reaching your dreams generally will offer the best chance for success. So there you have it -- some effective tips to manage those pesky thoughts of doubt and fear. Don't give fear the power to prevent you from achieving your life's goals! By staying on top of your own thoughts, you can pave the way for career and personal fulfillment that lasts a lifetime.
© 2007 Kathy Sanborn
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